The Funcooker

I read this book nearly 10 years after it’s release (1993). I don’t think I had the capability to understand the vocabulary used in the book if I were to have read it any earlier. Okay, I’ll give myself some credit. I was well into college when I read it, but it is chock full of vocab I’ve never heard any 14 year old use— cuz I certainly never did. This book follows the adventures of Nick Twisp and is written out as a diary/journal. Since it’s been a long time since I last picked this book up, I copped this entry from Wikipedia… Go Me!

The book’s protagonist is Nicholas “Nick” Twisp, a 14-year-old boy of above-average intelligence going through puberty. He is naturally obsessed with girls and sex but has had little experience with either. His life continues like a normal teenager’s with his best friend Leroy, a.k.a. Lefty, and his divorced parents George and Estelle. His mother is dating a truck driver named Jerry, who sells a group of sailors a Chevy Nova that dies soon after the sailors get it. In response, the sailors go for revenge. After outsmarting them, Jerry strategically decides to take a vacation, so they all go to a religious mobile home camp.

It is there that Nick meets Sheridan “Sheeni” Saunders and his life is turned completely upside down. Through plots to get Sheeni closer to him he ends up with several crimes on his hands and is forced to run from the cops. He tricks everyone into thinking he went to India, thereby escaping the police. Nick hides out with his sister Joanie and returns with help from his friend in Ukiah, Frank “Fuzzy” DeFalco. He dresses in Fuzzy’s late grandmother’s clothes, adopting the name Carlotta and a conservative disposition, so that Nick may enter the public. As he does so, he befriends Sheeni and several other people who Nick knew before. While spending the night with Sheeni on Christmas Eve, she reveals to him that she knew from the beginning it was him, not Carlotta. He then gets “the best Christmas present a youth could receive,” starting a secret relationship with Sheeni.

Faced with homelessness from the loss of the house he had been squatting in, he becomes rich beyond belief when an idea of his, a wart watch, makes it big. His wealth grows further when an elderly neighbor of his Nick’s older sister takes a liking to Nick and decides to put him in her will. When she dies Nick is briefly left half a million dollars richer, until his mother’s boyfriend, a somewhat corrupt cop, seizes the money.

So, there you have it. I really recommend the read if you can get your hands on a copy. “But don’t take my word for it…” *Ba Dun Dun* (Reading Rainbow testimonial segue soundclip)


BTW, this book has an upcoming film adaptation starring Michael Cera as Nick Twisp. Will he ever grow out of the “awkward teen” role? I hope so, yet I hope not.

No matter how stressed out I become, one of my favorite places to de-stress is in-between some large bookshelves.

When I worked at the library last year, the peace that came with working in the shelves was a unique perk. Ordinarily, I don’t usually peruse the library unless I’m looking for something. It’s a habit I should do more often, if just to calm my high-strung mind. Even the dust doesn’t bother me much.

The feeling of being surrounded above my head of books brings comfort and security that could be equaled to a hug. Making a list dozens of items long of books or subjects that I want to read up on has a sense of accomplishment laced with it. The near-silence of the rows, the pleasure in reading a passage or two from a great author, the surprises at every turn; they make libraries special. Even just sitting between the shelves gives me peace.

I’m not one to be fearful of technology. I don’t have a Kindle (or other electronic book reader), but I’m not completely against it. There are times for each, but I’m pretty secure in my knowledge that libraries and hard copy books will always exist. Digital files are great, but they are also easily lost.

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Rebooting franchises seems to be the popular route taken these days. In the case of bringing John McClane back to the big screen, well, that’s not happening right now. However, BOOM! Studios is working on Die Hard: Year One, a prequel story that takes us into McClane’s rookie years in good ol’ NYC.

“America’s greatest action hero is translated into the sequential art form for the first time! Every great action hero got started somewhere. Batman Began. Bond had his Casino Royale. And for John McClane, more than a decade before the first Die Hard movie, he’s just another rookie cop, an East Coast guy working on earning his badge in New York City during 1976’s Bicentennial celebration… and the Summer of Sam. Too bad for John McClane, nothing’s ever that easy.” (Source)

Year One is set to hit comic book shelves this August. Written by Howard Chaykin, art by Stephen Thompson, covers by Dave Johnson, Jock and John Paul Leon. Very interested to see how this pans out, especially working in everyone’s favorite catch phrase, “Yippee ki-yay, motherfucker!”